Pandemic Progress: Five Ways to More Lah-dee-dah Days
Volume: Low and mellow
Issue: No issue. Everything is so fine!
Date: August 15, 2021
“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. Doing nothing often leads to the very best of something.”—Winnie the Pooh
Five Ways to More Lah-dee-dah Days
So I have wasted about two years of my life reading umpteen articles on “How to Live to be 100” by changing my sleep, my diet, my exercise, my inner voices, my electronic use. Ugh, that advice is work and, as Maynard G. Krebs said on Gilligan’s Island, “WERK!?!?”
SLEEP: The sleep warnings about getting 7-9 hours keep me up at night worrying that I am not getting enough sleep! No one can make them self sleep! I believe there is such a thing as half-sleep—my body is idling but my mind is at 45mph counting variants instead of sheep—so I count these as half-hours toward my sleep total. Four or five hours of sleep allow me to eat and talk, so good enough is good enough. Word of the day: CATNAP!
DIET: Mediterranean Diet? Fruit and veggies PLUS Italian pasta and gelato, Greek Pastisio, and Spanish Tapas. Keto Diet? No chocolate, no ice cream, one beer—are you keto-ing me? Paleo Diet? Who wants a diet that makes you turn pale at the thought of peanut butter and cheesecake? Fasting? The fast track to hangry grumpiness! You are what you eat—fat and happy!
EXERCISE: Who says you have to walk 5,000 steps a day? The Incas walked 3,200 steps up and down Machu Picchu and look what happened to that civilization! Exercise choice: Fit Bit—or Fit Bit Bites?
MEDITATE, SHMEDITATE: NO can do. I have the genetic marker DNAWORRY24/7 stamped on my telomeres. Oy Vey is my middle name. Especially during a new covid variant, I fear that, even while double-masked and with a face shield, catastrophe is just around the corner—BUT WHICH CORNER?
ELECTRONICS: Especially during the pandemic, how can we moderate our lifelines—our cell phone and laptop use? WHAT? Minimize Zooming with family, catching up on news online, Games with Friends, and streaming all six seasons of Line of Duty?? And Safari, how I love me some Safari—Safari, you answer all my used-to-ask-my-Jewish-mother questions: How long are hard-boiled eggs good in the fridge? What spices are best for cooking brisket? How to get a chocolate stain out of a white tee shirt?
So, this morning, after five hours (three regular hours + four half-hours) of sleep and a breakfast where I achieved inner peace by exercising my jaw as I ate five chocolate chip cookies, it is fun connecting electronically with you, my email friend. A good start to doing my day my way.
Wishing you a good Lah-dee-dah Day your way,
Irene